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Satanic Rites 4
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Satanic Rites - Issue 4 (1993-05-29)(Destiny).adf
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mme_pico
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1990-01-05
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4KB
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91 lines
}0a0000oddf1oddf2occf3occf4obbf5obbf6oaaf7oaaf
{2 {nOHH, YOU POOR DEAR!{1{a
}0o99f1o99f2o88f3o88f4o77f5o77f6o66f7o66f
}0a0000oddf1oddf2occf3occf4obbf5obbf6oaaf7oaaf
{2{n (YOUR PROBLEMS SOLVED BY MADAME PICO){1{a
}0o99f1o99f2o88f3o88f4o77f5o77f6o66f7o66f
~iff.mme_pico
}0off00n0ef {m Dear Madame Pico,{a
I must object to the way in which
{nDestiny's {mSatanic Rites {a constantly
uses me as a reference to obesity. I
hope that they realise that this sort
}0n0c0
of thing is at the root of buliemia.
{mClaire Rayner.{a
}0n0ef0if22
{m Hello Dearies! {aMadame Pico here to {nMme Pico: {aFuck off you stupid fat
solve any problems that you may have. bitch. You got the coushy Tv-Am job,
Simply write, in confidence to my remember? I could wop the bot off you
attic here at {hDestiny WHQ{a, or if your anyday, Auntie, and don't forget it.
life is fine, feel free to send other
people's problems. Anyhow luvvies, we {mDear Madame Pico,{a
start this issue's line up with a
letter winging it's way from Claire I'm a lonely single man living in
Rayner... North Norway. I been considering the
possibility of {fcomputer dating{a. How {mDear Madame Pico, {a
can I best {himpress {athe computer on our
first date? I've got a big mental problem
Madame. I don't tolerate intolerant
{cJay Jablonski, Karasjok. {a people. I've just shot my auntie and
her puppy-se*-doll with a
three-step-motorized vibrator. What
{eMme Pico: {a Ohh, you poor dear! to do???
Obviously it's not size that's
}0iff0
important, it's what you do with it, {cIntolerant.{a
but generally the bigger your
hard-drive the more impressed she'll {hMme Pico:{a ???
}0nfff
{mbe. Remember; the clearer your data
~iff.dty
line, the larger your packet, and
{mthat's no doubt what she's after. My
}0o0ef
guess is that she'll think you're too
flash if you turn up on the first date
with your optical storage, so keep to {n Dear Madame Pico,{m
the basic floppies for the first
night. I was at the doctor and he told me
that I suffered from the very well
known "profound lack of anything Daily Sport I get stimulated and my
resembling intelligence"- syndrome. errhm... "thing" eh... ...hmm...
}0i0c00j0ef0kff0
He also said that there's nothing to well, increases in size. Is this
do with it. Is this true? Please normal? My parents told me that
help! children are made from flowers, but I
doubt it. I need an answer now. Am I
{hSwede.{m sick or healthy???
{jMme Pico: {m Dearie, your problem is
that your doctor's Norwegian, as was {jMme Pico:{m Ohh, you poor dear!
probably the guy who wrote this Seven-year olds shouldn't be reading
}0if22
letter. Apparently, the joke across the Daily Sport as they should pitch
the rest of {hScandinavia {m is that their reading at a higher level. What
Swedish people have little you have experienced Dearie is an
intelligence. Oh dear.... errection. Welcome to the real World.
}0i0ef
{hDear Madame Pico, Deer Mdaame Pcio!{m
I'm a 7 year old sexually frustrated Plasee h;lep em, m'I d&^xylescix, I nd
English boy living in {hSouthport,{m hlp mor dan ani oters.
Lancashire. Every time I read the afroi erhgeljreg.
{fMem iPco:{a hho you, poor daer! Srroy
but I ca'nt hlep yuo!
{cMadame Pico {areturns next issue.
{e (Unless she decides to go on holiday
again)
Hopefully no more poor {fdyslexia {ejokes.
~iff.mme_pico